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McDude's Kind of Coolpost-oral coital chitchat |
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� 2004-01-25 - 8:26 p.m. I�ve hung out with the dancer a couple of times in the last week. We first went out for pizza before Christmas. I described as having huge breasts for a dancer. She has huge breasts for anyone let alone a dancer. We went out to dinner last weekend and played mini golf before returning to her place so I could teach her how to play poker. When we got to her place I started drinking and before I knew it I was rather drunk. We made out for a while and I passed out on the couch. While we were making out she told me that no one had ever gone down on her and she didn�t want me to yet. I was confused because it wasn�t like her clothes were flying off. I had to work from home last Friday night to test some things out and invited her over. We watched �The Hours�. In the middle of the movie she asked me if I knew why one character was upset with another character, as if I were not sitting there watching the same movie. Then we were watching a family guy episode when, out of the blue, she starts talking about how she can repeat all 50 states in alphabetical order. I don�t think she understands when it is appropriate to talk during a movie. So I decided to make her watch a couple of Tenacious D skits, two involving loads of jizz and one involving a guy giving birth out of his ass. Most people who have strong stomachs have found them sickening. She covered her eyes and refused to watch. I felt a little guilty about making her watch it but that is what she gets for talking during things that I am interested in. After I was done working she made a move on me. This time things went a little further. She motioned for me to go down on her and I did. Then she did the same. Her boobs are so big that when she was giving me head they were squishing my balls. It is quite painful to have 5-pound balloons bouncing against my boys. So afterwards we were lying there talking when she said something that reminded me of my old college roommate�s ex-girlfriend, who I happened to date for 4 months in high school. I mention this and all of a sudden she gets quiet. Then she proclaims that she is going home and abruptly leaves. Five minutes after she leaves she calls crying and says, �Maybe you shouldn�t talk about other girls when you are in bed with one.� What the hell is this? Jesus. Excuse me for making post-oral coital chitchat. She called and apologized the next day. After she apologized she paused. I assume the pause was for me so that I could apologize. Screw that. I�m not going to apologize for something that was not in the wrong. We had a short conversation and said our good-byes. She called me again this morning. Then emailed me. I think she�s stalking me. So, I�ve decided to call her and let her know that I don�t think we are compatible. Hopefully it will go well. Nobody enjoys making people cry. Like this entry? Vote for me here!
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