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McDude's Kind of CoolA chicken and a Grape? |
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� 2001-06-04 - 8:40 p.m. Today at lunch I told the one joke I found humorous over the weekend. �A Priest, Rabbi, and a blonde walk into a bar. The bartender says, �What is this some kind of Joke!!� It fell upon silent looks of confusion. I used to know a ton of korny jokes. I was the king of bad humor. This joke is a prime example of the jokes I used to frequently speak. I guess some people think they are way out in left field. I think they are in the batters box. Now whenever the table is silent I will here cracks like, �Geesh McDude did you just tell a joke again.� Damn, can I set can I set up my buddies for wiseass cracks. Here is a fan favorite from my past: What does a chicken and a grape have in common? They are both purple except for the chicken. Damn what a classic that one is.
For one reason or another I haven�t learned many jokes in the last year or so. When I come across old friends I haven�t seen in a while they�ll ask me for a new joke. After quickly scanning my brain I am forced to leave them without a joke. I will not sacrifice my style of joke telling for a �Good Joke�. I believe jokes should be short and sweet. One-liners, and question answer jokes are much better than the long story variety. No bad voices of gay men, irish men, retarded men, blonde women. Just quick and to the point cheese. Nothing is worse then sitting for three minutes to a guy doing bad voices waiting for a punch line like, �Then the farmer said, �Damn these gay roosters.�� The only good story jokes are the ones you made up yourself. Whether they are funny or not at least you know it is an original. Damn fucking men for liking fake tits. I hate fake tits. I think the only guys who like breast implants are Hollywood producers and guys looking for trophy wives. The only people who should get breast implants are transvestites and male inmates. Instead of three �strikes your out�, it should be �three strikes and you get boobs�. Of course all the transvestites would become mad gang bangers just so they can get some free boobs. And damn people who write TV shows. Because TV is mindless bullshit written for 12 year olds. If there was something good on Television I am sure all the street pushers would get off the streets and sit in front of the TV while drawing social security. The world would be a much better place. �He fixes the cable?� � The Dude, The Big Lebowski Like this entry? Vote for me here!
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